Are You Abusive

Does having power and control over others make you more masculine? Does it make you stronger, tougher, more virile? Only if you believe in mindless stereotypes.

So let's get real. Insults, threats, power and control aren't a normal part of any relationship.  Not normal, not respectable ... definitely not right.

Did you know that abuse isn't just about physical violence? That's right - there's a lot more to it than that. Abuse can start with subtle behaviours that just aren't right, then escalate into serious emotional, sexual, and physical abuse.

Ask yourself some tough questions. Do you ...

• control the finances and keep the information to yourself?
• believe you are better than her?
• feel jealous or possessive about her?
• put her down?
• check up on her or follow her?
• listen to her phone conversations?
• check her email account or social networking site?
• text or call her excessively?
• try to control what she does, where she goes, and who she sees?
• blame her for your anger or actions?
• have difficulty controlling your temper?
• yell at her?
• try to intimidate her with your strength and size?
• hit things or harm pets to scare her?
• push or restrain her when you're angry?
• guilt or force her into having sex?

Do you try to tell yourseIf it's okay? Think it's no big deal? When deep down inside, you know that it is.

If you do any of these things, it's serious.

So don't minimize it, don't deny it, and don't blame anyone else for what you do.  

Control is a good thing ... when you control yourself.